Pluto follows St. Christopher

A day of ignominy for the celestial body formerly known as the Planet Pluto--just as the Catholic Church demoted saints like Nicholas and Christopher, so now Pluto has lost the status it held since 1930 and been downgraded to something called a "dwarf planet". No more will third-graders fashion mobiles of nine gradated sizes of crumpled paper. 8 is the new 9 in our trimmed-down solar system.

There, Pluto--that's what you get for horning in on Neptune's orbit. And think of the economic boon as millions of new science textbooks are rushed to print.